There is in Cicionia in Gaul a man named Dr. Donestre, whose head is right where it belongs and who has the usual number of limbs, range of skin color, and eating and sexual habits for the typical human; indeed, he is thought to be human. His destiny was made when his parents unknowingly gave him a middle name synonymous with a little-known 3rd-century eight-foot-tall, dog-headed Christian martyr. With all the powers a PhD grants, he fights ignorance and crime as a department chair at an unnamed charter school.
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